August 24th, 2010

oldlady72

When stress eats you alive ...

... sometimes you just fold.

I am weary to the bone.

After my happy happy car purchase Saturday afternoon, Saturday night came:

My f-i-l is declining rapidly. (Reminder - he was told he had prostate cancer and he has a large lump in his abdomen. They biopsied and bone scanned. Lower lymph node involvement and in his leg bones. He'll get chemo shots to halt the progression, but....) When one of my s-i-l's couldn't reach him on Saturday for a couple of hours in the evening we headed over to his house. Dave doesn't have a key (he now has one as of Sunday), but we knocked and yelled and heard him from a distance from the front door that he had fallen and couldn't get up. (Yeah, the commercial, I know! I am a bad person, but it went through my head.)

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Today I learn a co-worker is in the hospital, but should be fine in a few hours to a few days. I must fill in for him tomorrow. Well, I can't work until close as I have a meeting I cannot miss at 6:30 p.m. so someone will have to work alone for 2 hours. Oh well. This Saturday I was to drive to Columbus to meet 2 people I've known for years online. Time will tell if I get to do that or if I have to work. ~sigh~

I cried all morning. After I - horrible person that I am - overslept and did it so hard I did not hear the dog going batshit crazy when my grandson was dropped off for his last summer Tuesday with me before school starts. So he had to go to work with his mom. I woke up 1/2 hour after he should have been there. I shot bolt upright in bed, threw on clothes, ran downstairs and found many missed text messages and phone calls on my cell phone. My youngest son slept through it, too. To say I felt like a shit heel is gross understatement.

Comments turned off because I know you guys love me and I love you, too, but I just cannot respond right now. Did I mention I am weary through to my bones?


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