July 27th, 2008


I got nudged by pendamuse

Because I've not only been a lazy bitch by not updating, but I've not even been reading hardly at all here. To do a true update would take forever. I'll not do that. I've been more than a bit of a hermit, online and off. I went through a very dark time and am slowly coming out of it. Many things triggered it, a build up over the last two years with added new events. I don't think I've ever been in quite such a horrid place before, but it could just be my memory protecting myself by telling me that. :P~

Life is however looking brighter and I've got a tiny ounce of motivation back. A very tiny flame of motivation, but I am trying to fan it bigger without blowing it out (ha ha) and I expect to be much closer to my "normal" self by the end of summer. There is no way I will catch up on weeks and weeks of LJ posts (I've only randomly been reading a few), so if I missed any huge events in your life know that if it was a happy event you have my congratulations and if it was not a happy one you have my hugs.

I'll try as part of my renewing motivation not to be such a putz en ré LJ. I love you, Penda! This icon's for you ~ I know it makes you giggle.

Important for me to remember, from yezida's journal

Last week, I wrote this as an open question:

They teach about the supernal light, and the lifting of the heart, and the understanding of the bigger picture. They do not teach about the sadness…

And received this in reply:

Sadness is no different from the joy. Your sadness is for humanity, for the earth, and so is your joy. Your joy is also the Limitless, which is also in humanity. There is no difference. Do not try to make it so. Ease your heart and know that in its sorrow, it is perfect. Keep present with the journey of your soul. Do not worry. All is well. All manner of things are well. Drink from the well. Shine with its light. Praise the Gods, honor the ancestors, dance.

Life and death walk hand in hand. Joy and sorrow are held inside the heart. So I meditate. I exercise my body. I say my prayers. I light candles. I sit in the sunshine. I wonder. I get back to work.

Whatever you are feeling today, I hope that includes happiness. Take some pleasure in a moment. Right now.

In the midst of the sorrowing of the earth, something new is also being born. In Denver. In Ouagadougou. In Ahmedabad and Bangalore.